I’ve never been more stumped on how to title this because this technically isn’t a review so I have no clue how to appropriately label it in a few words. Anyway, I hope the above attempt works in someway. For those who haven’t heard yet, Timeless star Matt Lanter and his wife, the lovely Angela Lanter of Hello Gorgeous are expecting their first child and documenting it for us. Now while the podcast is primarily focused on all things pregnancy, there’s a moment in episode four that needs to be elaborated on here at MGcircles where we’re essentially focused on creating a positive environment for celebrities. (Fun fact, I hate that word. I hate that word with a passion. There should be a new one.)
As you all know by now, we’re severely against “real life-shipping”, and for those who haven’t heard that term circulate outside of fandom, it’s used to describe the desired pairing of actors as opposed to their characters. We’re totally here for the good ol’ TV/film/book shipping game. We’ve got a lot of great fictional ships we love, but beyond that, we’ve always made it clear that actors are not their characters and a line should be drawn somewhere. That said, as we wrote about it recently, we’re also against media continuously bringing attention to fallen relationships essentially invading the privacy of those we claim we care for and perpetrating to the problem. Now while this is a huge problem in our industry’s media, the problem I’ll be discussing today is even worse.
(As a formality to our structure, we’ll be referring to the Lanters by their last name, and since they’re close in age to us, it’s a bit weird to write Mr. and Mrs to distinguish who’s who. For the most part, the article will be focused on Angela Lanter, but when Matt Lanter comes to the picture, we’ll make it clear with parentheses. Easy enough, right?)
I imagine that it’s tough enough having to watch your spouse kiss other people in any way, but when you’re an actor, too it’s safe to assume that it’s a bit easier. When your occupation doesn’t involve playing pretend, it’s a whole other story. And Lanter is no stranger when it comes to laying out the truth for her readers. Now while it was adorable to hear Lanter (Matt) tell his wife that she’s the most beautiful woman he’s ever known, as a woman, I felt for her when she stated her concerns about pregnancy changing her appearance while he’s surrounded by gorgeous women throwing themselves at him. As women, no matter how confident we are in something or someone in this case, we have moments of doubt and heartache. We have moments where our confidence is drained from us.
The point of this article is to encourage people to put themselves in another’s shoe for a moment. I know girls that can’t even stand it when another likes their boyfriend’s instagram posts for crying out loud. But imagine what it must be like knowing that there are thousands, millions of people out there who view your husband or wife as an object. Imagine knowing that there are supposed “fans” out there who want your husband to date his co-star as opposed to wishing blessings upon the marriage he’s already in. And as someone who’s active in fandoms, I’ve seen this too many times to count. It’s disheartening. It’s vile. And it’s downright wrong. As writers, it’s also frustrating for us because there have been many times where we’ve opted out of writing certain performance reviews about scene partners because we knew someone somewhere would come in and say they “ship it.” There’s nothing wrong with acknowledging that two people are great scene partners — for instance Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone. I could watch the two of them in any genre, but beyond that, it’s vital to remember that each time, all they’re doing is embodying characters on a page. It’s important to be aware of the truth and the truth isn’t complicated. Actors are actors — characters are characters. There’s a clear distinction between them.
While I hope that was clear enough, the reason I’d encourage everyone to listen to Lanter’s actual words in the podcast is because that way, you’ll be able to hear the reality in her voice. Another thing she mentions is seeing the type of comments Lanter (Matt) receives, and while it’d be ridiculous to deny that he’s a good looking man, commenting inappropriate things isn’t okay. When a female actress for instance receives wildly inappropriate comments from a male fan, all hell breaks loose, so why is it okay for women to treat a male actor as a piece of meat? Let’s think on this for a moment — the double standards go against feminism in every way. E Q U A L I T Y.
As fans, we need to know our boundaries. We need to be able to respect actors and actresses in the same way we’d respect someone in our family or complete strangers. If you walked up to a complete stranger and started making vulgar comments about their face or body, you’d get in a whole lot of trouble. Let’s remember that the next time we’re tempted to say something inappropriate on social media.
All in all, I hope this article puts a few things into perspective. No one signs up for this kind of life, they sign up to do a job, and celebrities are just as human as we are. Respect them. Respect their spouses. Respect yourselves.
Be sure to check out Hello Bump Podcast — it’s not for the faint hearted or the squeamish, but if you plan to have children someday or you’re just curious, it’s interesting and surprisingly hilarious to get their perspective. I have a couple of friends that are already mothers, but every pregnancy is different and it’s fascinating to learn about just how crazy “the miracle of life” can be. Essentially, I’m in awe of Lanter’s honesty and vulnerability. It isn’t easy to admit certain things or talk about them, but the choice to do so showcases immense bravery and inspires many. She’s always been one of my favorite bloggers, and just when I thought I couldn’t appreciate and respect her more, Hello Bump Podcast came around.